Valerie's new zest for life

When Valerie Buckle was told she had cancer for the fourth time she didn't expect to survive. And she wasn't the only one. She dumbfounded the medical experts, too, but psychologically it took her a lot longer to recover. "I didn't know it at the time but psychologically I had become the cancer, when really my disability was in my mind and not in my body," she confesses. Even the smallest tasks were a problem. But recover she did and she puts her transformation down to a new five-day residential centre in Co Donegal, Ireland, known as the Helen Rollason Live Well Experience.

Valerie, of Meteor Road, Westcliff, was first diagnosed with cancer of the womb and cervix in 1986 and underwent surgery plus radiation rod treatment.

But in 2000 she discovered she had lung cancer. Radiation and chemotherapy treatment followed but nine months later she noticed her arm turning blue and a lump in her neck. Cancer again.

She underwent more chemotherapy and says her cancer responded well. Her illness was behind her, or so she thought. Then doctors found the disease was in her brain.

Intensive radiotherapy shrunk the tumour but unsurprisingly her spirits were now at a low ebb. "I got rid of all my clothes. I thought I wouldn't need them any more - I was going to die,
wasn't I?

"I had lots of side effects from the radiotherapy. I was confused a lot; my thyroid gland packed up and I'd been put on steroids, which made me really hyper," says the 56-year-old artist and mother of two.

Trying to readjust to a more limiting way of life was hard. She says she started to lack confidence and wouldn't go anywhere on her own.

"I also felt different. As if my body projected I had got old. And I felt old."

The turning point came when she heard about the Live Well Experience programme - a five-day residential programme that helps people do just that, live well with their cancer.

The therapeutic support and development programme has been specifically designed for people touched by cancer.

There people can access professional support to rethink their life priorities and it helps them develop tried and trusted relaxation and meditation techniques to boost their well-being.

"I thought, 'Wow! This is for me," said Valerie. So she plucked up the courage to book her ticket and off she went.

She recalls how she looked upon herself as a bit of a burden and remembers walking up to a group of old and frail people at the airport in Ireland thinking they must be the other people waiting to be transported to the Live Well Experience.

But she'd got it wrong - they pointed her in the direction of a completely different group of people, all much younger and none looked frail.

"Just shows you what I thought of myself, though," she says.

"The group counselling gave me confidence and the strength to talk about my cancer and my life," she explains. "I couldn't talk to my own family like that because I would worry them."

"I hadn't been able to function properly but by taking part in the LWE I began to realise that my limitations were more in my mind.

"It helped me see that it is really important to let go and face your cancer instead of thinking you have been tainted with it."

By the end of the programme she was going on long walks, dancing, singing, listening to music and taking part in meditation and Tai Chi.

"And I loved being in Ireland. It was a completely different culture and environment. The Irish people were very friendly and I thoroughly enjoyed the sea and countryside.

"I've adjusted and I know my capabilities but now I'm a lot more positive and I feel alive! I've started dress making again, I've got a part-time job as an inspector of elderly peoples' homes and I've just started ballroom dancing with my two teenage granddaughters.

"I've bought a whole new wardrobe, too."

If you want to learn more about the Live Well Experience call 01245 513348 or 01245 514325. You can also e-mail anna@helenrollason.co.uk